Night sky

went to the backyard for a while
saw the full bright moon lighting up the sky, above the only strip of clouds in the night sky - a dark painting, like the ones i used to stay awake on those cold nights just to look, look at the sky, look at the stars, sometimes even eating instant curry noodles with hashi or playing guitar and my dogs around me, keeping me warm...

those days are gone now...
fuck, even 2 of my dogs are gone...
went riding my bicycle from dawn to 3 a.m. looking everywhere
for several days straight
only to be dead tired and depressed for dont know how long after it
and fail my exams or not even going to them
even now when i hear a dog barking my heart skips a beat

only got one left
black haired with the most perfect hazel eyes i have ever seen

i really do believe i am not capable of loving a person
really dont care if im gay or straight
even now i dont have the means to really confirm any of the two
i had nothing of much value in my life
and now i have even less
no one to be there, no one to care about,
no one to share

No one to Love

I'm not joking when i write that the only reason i haven't killed myself already is because of curiosity of knowing what exactly does it feel to love someone

my dogs were the ones i loved,
who kept me warm and happy
nights like these only bring sadness to my mind
that only starts to fade away because my attention turns to something stupid
"why is it stupid?" - it always is...


i forgot what i ment to say with this post
i wonder even i had a point to begin with

fuck! i dont know... i really do think too much...



ps: if you are curious why i did that sometimes its because my house sits atop of an old castle wall and my view is one of the most beautiful things i have ever seen
i posted a photo of the view from my backyard in some other post - look it up and you'll understand why

Christmas + Bad Weather = Best of Friends

3.09 am
rain is pouring down on this city
it has already reached a limit
the fire alarm is sounding, waking everyone who could sleep with the noise
lightnings and heavy rain provided the lightshow and the soundtrack
my dog is whining down in the kitchen
i really cant see any fire, and even if there was one this bloody rain would surely put it out in a minute
total darkness is what i feel now
im liking the whole picture
has the day of reckoning come before us?
it would be fun if it was
goodbye sweet life
it was boresome living you

3.14
no electricity to take us to the present
heavy winds sing while we are out and take eveything away
rain washing whats left of these muddy streets
well, goodbye for now

3.18
something just flew away
my bedroom window just shakes a lot
no light still comes through
i just dont know what to say...

maybe tomorrow will come
maybe i will be posting this
maybe a giant meteor will kill us all

theres no sorrow in death
if it is death for all

we would all vanish,
no memories, no sadness, no happiness
no love
it would be as simple as that

we would cease to exist
we would live no more

not a poet, not a emo,
not a punk or goth,
not some wannabe
trying to be someone i'm not.
for whatever reason may be
also not hoping for this world to roth

im just that fucked up
simple, right?

gonna take my mind of things for now
but i will pray for salvation
not for my sake but for yours
i am free to die
dont really care what you do
still, i would not linger any longer in this place
if i were you...

3.34
what a waste of my time
the storm still lasts but
i am now out of wine............

......................fuck!!!

ignore me completly as i go downstairs for a refill and go to sleep to avoid all this being christmas and a time to be happy mumbo jumbo

EARTHQUAKE!!!!

I just felt everything shake :D

Sooo cool!!!

Bounced up and down on the top of my bed for a few seconds...

Really hope the building doesn't break apart - not that i really would mind if it did, i just wouldn't like it very much.

Here's to dreams of guitars and earthquakes... 

                                                           ...isn't life grand? 

 \(´*II*)/                                                                                      \(´*II*)/

Waking up, turning the alarm of, off to bed again to sleep...

So things are a little screwed up, skipped class, my family arrived now, so i pretty much missed the opportunity to miss them and act like i went to school 

Haven't cleaned my room either, so things are a complete mess; adding my lack of decency and "fuck you, i don't care!" attitude, i really don't know where this is going to end...

Its noon now, I'm writing this to look busy - such a deceitful bastard, aren't I?

Because i woke up late and its nearly Christmas, i think I'm gonna go downtown, see new things - haven't went there since I'm here in this fucking city

"I heard the sewers are nice" its just about everything i have to say in her defense.

A night like all other

dunno what to do, dunno what to think, dunno how to breathe, dunno how to blink...
i just lie here, time passing by, wishing to be alone while looking at the sky
but the sky is clouded, no beauty at all
a reflection of life in all its glory
like being against a 20 feet tall wall
the wall is guarded, robots rule the earth now

did you know that?

we are all going to die somehow...

Nº 1 Post

It's 2:06 a.m. and, just because I'm bored and have nothing better to do (sleeping doesn't count) i decided to start a blog.

I believe most stuff that we'll be posting here will be in english but if, for some weird reason, a language you don't know appears in this blog... well, it just means we are too lazy to write in actual english.

So here goes nothing...

           ...hoping to become something...