Seja como for...
Saturday, November 27, 2010
...
Alguém me consegue explicar do que se trata o processo de socializar, no que consiste porque se insiste tanto nele. Não sei não faço a mínima ideia. Pelo que já pude assistir até agora vejo pessoas, pessoas e pessoas todas a tentar seguir um rumo diferente, todas a tentarem ser diferentes de toda-gente. Com redes sociais a pedinchar por atenção. Do tipo "e deixo aqui este comentário, por favor vem ver o meu perfil e deixa também um, ouve as musicas que eu escolhi, as minhas musicas preferidas vê as fotos de coisas que eu fiz já programadas e encenadas de propósito a ser documentadas para ficar no meu perfil para outras pessoas verem mas para isso terei de o mencionar". Onde está a diferença pergunto eu, uns dizem "não falo mal de ninguém para não ser igual" mas acabam sempre por o fazer, onde está a diferença quando andam todos pelos centros comerciais "com os seus sapatos com solas feitas na china". Sociedade que se deixa embriagar por dopaminas artificiais perde a noção do correcto, do único, DO SER, DO EXISTIR. E resume-se única e exclusivamente à interacção. Eu não existi sempre (e ainda bem) por isso não sei se as relações sociais e humanas sempre foram assim. Mas não consigo perceber é algo que me ultrapassa. Será que no interior todos acabamos por achar que seremos todos diferentes. Ou no final de contas não seremos todos apenas uma enorme massificação estandardizada de acordo com quem nos diz o que usar, como estar o que fazer do que gostar.
Thursday, November 25, 2010
Tuesday, November 9, 2010
A long time has passed
It has been a long time since the last post and several things have happened.
Nothing good came out in these months and I have the feeling that nothing good will come in the future.
It's ok, doesnt really matter.
I lost a even greater deal of my memories but I'm still me. Life goes on.
Honestly i just dont give a fuck about anything anymore so I'll continue to write only to my hearts content.
Shit happens and i need a way to vent out things so, i'll keep writing, hoping to avoid repercussions of not doing anything at all.
If it sounds like a diary... to hell with it! It will be something along those lines.
So suit yourself out, read all you want, think whatever you might.
As long as i remain unknown I really dont give a shit
It's now 6:34 am and, after a slespless night like so many others since a few years ago, i find myself writing in the dark, afraid to go foward.
It's been 6 weeks since the start of college and i still havent showed up for classes, after a first morning full of excitement, unknown places, unknown people, not caring and an irrational aversion to it all.
If i keep this up it will be like in the other place where everything felt wrong. That time i may have had an excuse since my life was hell and i felt like i was just doing it to end up in a dead end tiresome job and be miserable for the rest of my life. Now, in a different area and place i find myself just not knowing how to react to it all.
All of it constantly reminding me of all these time periods that i hardly speak and when i do either i find myself speaking very short phrases in an inaudible manner or not being abble to speak at all.
In an hour or so gonna take a shower, see how i feel after it.
If im ok, after being awake for 24 hours i shall gather all my courage to face unknown beasts and finally get a chance to redeem myself or fall flat on my ass to call myself human trash.
Last years remorse was hell.
This year is starting to feel like it.
I will not be able to go trough it again.
Nothing good came out in these months and I have the feeling that nothing good will come in the future.
It's ok, doesnt really matter.
I lost a even greater deal of my memories but I'm still me. Life goes on.
Honestly i just dont give a fuck about anything anymore so I'll continue to write only to my hearts content.
Shit happens and i need a way to vent out things so, i'll keep writing, hoping to avoid repercussions of not doing anything at all.
If it sounds like a diary... to hell with it! It will be something along those lines.
So suit yourself out, read all you want, think whatever you might.
As long as i remain unknown I really dont give a shit
It's now 6:34 am and, after a slespless night like so many others since a few years ago, i find myself writing in the dark, afraid to go foward.
It's been 6 weeks since the start of college and i still havent showed up for classes, after a first morning full of excitement, unknown places, unknown people, not caring and an irrational aversion to it all.
If i keep this up it will be like in the other place where everything felt wrong. That time i may have had an excuse since my life was hell and i felt like i was just doing it to end up in a dead end tiresome job and be miserable for the rest of my life. Now, in a different area and place i find myself just not knowing how to react to it all.
All of it constantly reminding me of all these time periods that i hardly speak and when i do either i find myself speaking very short phrases in an inaudible manner or not being abble to speak at all.
In an hour or so gonna take a shower, see how i feel after it.
If im ok, after being awake for 24 hours i shall gather all my courage to face unknown beasts and finally get a chance to redeem myself or fall flat on my ass to call myself human trash.
Last years remorse was hell.
This year is starting to feel like it.
I will not be able to go trough it again.
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